How the TCI Tax Will Steal Christmas

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Every regular American likes driving a lot,
But greenies, like Rhode Island Governor Raimondo, do not.

The greenies hate driving!  The whole idea of freedom!
Go-doers might go do things greenies think to be dumb!
They know they know better; they know it’s just wrong,
All of that driving, with a smile and a song,
To get to our meetings, to movies, to football,
And to jobs where we profit, which is most dreadful of all.

For greenies like Raimondo one season is worst:
Christmastime, when bellies and shopping carts burst.
When that festive time comes, gasoline makes it work,
From the Black Friday sale to the office-party perk,
Getting kids to their pageants and gifts from the store…
Raimondo stares at a paper that will help make it no more.

“They’re going out shopping,” she snarls with a sneer.
“Then they’ll fill up their cars to drive there and drive here!
Just like every Christmas season — All year, without end! —
They zip all around to see family and friends.
They go to their jobs and motorbike for recreation…
I must make our gas prices highest in the nation!”

And there on her desk — what the greenies want her to do —
Is a pen to sign that paper, a sly M.O.U.,
A Memorandum Of Understanding that Rhode Island says “yes”
To the Transportation & Climate Initiative at a price we can’t guess.
A new TCI tax is just what they’ll do.
They say it’s an “allowance,” but it’s a “tax” through and through.

Everything that you do, every good for every buyer,
Every fun you might have, would have costs that are higher.
Every family, person, and business would of course feel the pinch,
Every George Bailey, Santa, Scrooge, and even the Grinch.
With snow on the ground and tinsel on her fake Christmas pine,
Let’s hope the Whos of Rhode Island tell Gina, “Don’t sign!”